302 MINISODE Yvonne Silver: Words of Wisdom

Yvonne Silver is an entrepreneur and the bestselling author of “Words, Women & Wisdom: The Modern Art of Confident Conversations”. She shares words that elevate the confidence of women in business, plus advice around how to align with your values, ask for help and hire the right team members early enough to grow your business without burnout.

Melinda Wittstock:         Yvonne, welcome to Wings.

Yvonne Silver:                   Thank you for having me. Nice to be here.

Melinda Wittstock:         Yes, it’s great to have you back. You were one of my early guests and I love to talk to so many inspiring women like yourself about what is inspiring you in this new exciting 2019.

Yvonne Silver:                   Yes, well it’s already been a crazy fall with the launch of my first solo book. I’ve done a couple of anthologies in the past. This is my solo book and it hit bestseller status the day after it launched. So super exciting and it’s been crazy busy.

Melinda Wittstock:         Oh, that’s awesome. Well, that’s inspiring. After all the work, I know you put a lot of work into your book, and tell everybody a little bit about your book and where you’re going to take it from here?

Yvonne Silver:                   Yeah, well it’s called, Words, Women & Wisdom: The Modern Art of Confident Conversations. And I put this book together to include forty different words that elevate, or can very quickly dissipate, energy for women and their confidence. I’ve been working as a coach specifically for women, women entrepreneurs, and leaders over the last 10 years and then also had 30 years in total working with women, working in human resources, senior roles, career development and I realize that there was several questions that kept coming up. One in particular, which was how can I be more confident. That’s what women kept asking me. So I thought about that question, thought about what I have shared in coaching and put together 40 different words in the book to help elevate women’s confidence. And it’s been really popular so far.

Melinda Wittstock:         Okay, so just give us a couple of those words because I know that confidence is an issue for many, many women. So what are … just give us a couple of the most important empowering words.

Yvonne Silver:                   Well, “enough” is one of them. And that’s partly the self-talk piece. Making sure that we are very firmly grounded at the beginning of our day and that we know that we are contributing in a way that is incredibly valuable both to organizations that we might be working for, to our clients, and being really solid in how we describe what it is we do, the value that it adds, and being enough. Because if we are purposeful and we can solidly stand in a positive energy, we know that we’re enough and that comes across really quickly.

A really easy one is should. And I don’t know about you Melinda, but whenever I have someone say, “Oh, you should have done this or you should do that.” Right away I feel the hairs on the back of my neck going up it’s probably my entrepreneur bent. Whereas if that word is exchanged for “could”, it has a whole different energy: It moves from an energy of obligation and criticism potentially into an energy, positivity, and possibility. And it’s just a simple shift from “should” to “could”.

Melinda Wittstock:         So that is so compelling Yvonne, and of course, on the entrepreneurial journey we know that there are challenges along the way and sometimes those challenges can sap our confidence. But I really want to [crosstalk 00:04:33] this concept of challenge because it goes with the territory as an entrepreneur and it can actually make you stronger. So what are some of your challenges right now?

Yvonne Silver:                   Well, I think that this is not uncommon, but getting stuck in the growth cycle is how I refer to it. So it’s that desire to build your business and to be going at a pace that is in sync with the flow of what’s coming your way and what’s working really, really well and also building systems in and the team in order to support growth. And trying to do all of those things at once. Wearing many, many hats as an entrepreneur can be quite challenging and sometimes those bursts [crosstalk 00:05:22] mindset of I can’t hire anybody to add to my team because I know I don’t have money to do that yet and yet we’re actually wasting time by not doing that and trying to do everything ourselves. That’s something that I’ve learned. I’ve learned it the hard way and I can’t say I’m a complete expert at it, I don’t a team of hundreds yet, however I am definitely working towards expanding what it is that I offer through more systems, more effective technology usage, and also bringing on staff accordingly.

Melinda Wittstock:         Ah, right. No that’s really great and it’s interesting we do learn our lesson sometimes the hard way, but that’s just the nature of the endeavor. It’s funny, isn’t it humbling. Right? It is humbling. So, what are your top three go-to pieces of advice for women in business and female founders?

Yvonne Silver:                   Yeah, well on that same theme I really have seen and I spent 15 years in different senior HR roles and I’ve really seen what a difference it can make when there is a fully inspired and empowered team in place. Particularly for a smaller entrepreneurs where you can actually then step away from the business and start thinking about how you can have a holiday or spend more time with your family or really have fun in the business. That was why you set it up to begin with. So my first tip is to make sure that you hire great people but do it before your way too busy to actually spend the time or invest the time, should I say, in recruiting them well, having the time to onboard them properly, and pay them as much as you can actually afford to pay them. Don’t skimp out paying the least amount that you can pay because turnover is a huge time waster, it wastes time, it wastes money, and it very often wrecks customer relationships. Hire great people and do it early.

Take time for mindfulness is the second one. What I mean by that is really paying attention to your own energy, how your emotions are showing up in your body, taking time early in the day for you first so you show up fully grounded and listen deeply to what your body’s telling you. And pay attention to what emerges. If we’re running from busy, busy, busy and appointment-to-appointment-to-appointment with no space in between it doesn’t give time for mindfulness and paying attention.

The third one is about asking. That’s part of the content of the book is how to ask for what you really want and get it in a variety of different approaches. If you don’t ask you’ll never know what they may have been coming down the pipeline for you. Whether it’s an increase with a client or looking at expanding into a new country, expanding your network. I think women forget that it’s okay to ask. Because if you don’t ask, 50% chance you’re not going to get it.

Melinda Wittstock:         Right. This is so, so true and it’s one of the things that so many women struggle with. We try and do it all. We think that having it all means we’ve got to do it all. We don’t we can ask for help. So Yvonne how can all of our listeners find you, work with you, and of course, buy your book?

Yvonne Silver:                   Well I have a refreshed website which is connected with the book. So it’s wordswomenandwisdom.com and it’s spelled out A-N-D, as opposed to an ampersand, wordswomenandwisdom.com and slash coach is actually where I have some information about one of my processes which is a power higher process and also an opportunity to learn a little bit more about what it is that I’m doing. There is a chance to buy a copy of the book. There’s a link on the home page with a little video about the book if you have it’s less than five minutes have an interest to learn more about how it came about, what’s included, and also links to Amazon. It’s available on Amazon as well now.

Melinda Wittstock:         Lovely. I recommend that everybody go out there and get Yvonne’s book and obviously in the show notes we’ll have the links to all of that as well. So Yvonne thank you for putting on your wings and fling with us.

Yvonne Silver:                   It’s been a pleasure Melinda. Love what you’re doing, love being a part of this podcast, and any of your programs it’s great to see women supporting other women. Love it.